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Passage

February 17, 2012

This is the photo prompt from Madison Woods:

http://madisonwoods.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/my-sitting-spot.jpgCo

Come up with a story, 100 words, more or less, based on the above picture.

Passage

Ladora led Morel to the place of sacrifice and his heart sank.

“Look, my love,” she said, kneeling by a rock. “Through the water, the veins in the leaves.”

Morel’s hand dipped below the cool surface, causing ripples. “They don’t see  everything,” he said.

“How can you know?”

Her light eyes followed his hand as it struck his chest.

“I still have breath.”

The skies darkened, rumbled.

“They see.” Ladora covered her eyes, but Morel stood defiant.

Wind swept the forest, bending and twisting branches.

He would not lose her.

Embracing, pelted by rain, they awaited their gods’ anger, and found none.

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27 Comments leave one →
  1. February 17, 2012 9:41 am

    I guess Zeus wasn’t paying attention. You create a nice mystery about what happened to precipitate this scene, but I’m glad you gave us a happy ending.
    Here’s mine: bridgesareforburning.wordpress.com/

    • February 18, 2012 11:49 am

      To tell you the truth, I was running out of words, so I went easy on them. Glad I did. Thanks for the compliment.

  2. February 17, 2012 9:49 am

    Very interesting, although slightly confusing. I was left wondering how they ended up there, what had happened to anger the gods?

    Here’s mine: http://teschoenborn.com/

    • February 18, 2012 1:17 pm

      They were at the place of sacrifice. By not offering Ladora, his beloved, in sacrifice to the gods, Morel was risking their anger.
      Hope that helps. Thanks for stopping by

  3. TheOthers1 permalink
    February 17, 2012 10:25 am

    I loved this!

  4. February 17, 2012 11:28 am

    I really wasn’t expecting a happy ending (what does that say about my view of the world??). Here’s mine: http://postcardfiction.com/2012/02/17/flash-friday-simple-pleasures/

    • February 18, 2012 11:52 am

      I think we’re all in a funk when it comes to our view of the world. Thank you for stopping by and commenting.

  5. February 17, 2012 12:45 pm

    Oh I love the ending. It’s so unexpected and yet somehow draws us back into the way life usually works — we expect something so terrible to happen and then it doesn’t.

    Beautiful job.

    Mine’s here: http://thecolorlime.wordpress.com/2012/02/17/imaginary-friend/

  6. February 17, 2012 4:19 pm

    I really enjoyed this. The fatalistic tone of the dialogue and its contrast with the close of the story, the vivid imagery, the questions raised… great stuff 🙂
    Here’s mine:
    http://andyfloodwritersblog.wordpress.com/2012/02/17/the-summoning/

  7. February 17, 2012 4:23 pm

    Perhaps “Aphrodite” interfered on their behalf? She has been known to do such things. 😀 Wonderful job. The story is clean, and one can “read” what happened before the story began in medias res.

    The link to my drabble this week is: http://quillshiv.wordpress.com/2012/02/17/reading-tree-leaves/

  8. February 17, 2012 5:32 pm

    Nice! I love the ending; in love’s embrace.

  9. Lora Mitchell permalink
    February 18, 2012 12:06 am

    Nice trick. I didn’t expect a happy ending. Lucky for them, God was not angry that day.
    Here’s mine: http://www.triplemoonstar.blogspot.com

  10. February 18, 2012 1:16 am

    Are you aware that this was probably the most upbeat and joyful story of all this weeks submissions? (I’ve got a good memory, but it’s short so i might have forgotten some. Still and all…) I’ve been yearning without knowing it for something happy in all of these stories. Thanks for writing your ending so perfectly.

    Aloha,

    Doug

    http://ironwoodwind.wordpress.com/2012/02/17/ask-ulysses/

  11. February 18, 2012 7:36 am

    Okay, i had to re-read before i could make meaning of it and i enjoyed the feeling of having confronted their god with no consequence…maybe it may come in the future as in the ways of the gods…but presently, they can indulge as much as they like.

    http://seewilliams.wordpress.com/2012/02/17/stuck-the-other-side-of-valour-100words-flash-fiction/#comment-39

    • February 18, 2012 12:54 pm

      That was my thinking , too. Maybe Morel’s defiance will be his undoing. It saved him this time, but maybe not again. Thanks for your comment.

  12. February 18, 2012 6:31 pm

    I was too lazy to read all the comments (oops) so forgive me if I’m repeating others.

    I loved the happy and (in my mind) completely unexpected ending. I feel that all too often we (or more honestly, I) hold myself in such high esteem that of course beings far more powerful than I would take notice of me and either smite me or give me wings (depending on what I’ve most recently done) and yet my life continues on in all normalcy. This piece captures some of that egocentric nature and how it usually plays out. I loved it!

    Here’s mine:
    http://threedescriptors.wordpress.com/2012/02/17/flash-fiction-6/

    • February 20, 2012 4:24 pm

      I’m glad you enjoyed it. I wasn’t sure which action would decide their fate: their love for each other or Morel’s arrogance, but the gods judged wisely. Thanks for commenting.

  13. February 18, 2012 7:13 pm

    Loved this line: “Look, my love,” she said, kneeling by a rock. “Through the water, the veins in the leaves.”

  14. Madison Woods permalink
    February 19, 2012 3:49 pm

    I enjoyed the lack of consequence from their choice, and even if you didn’t mean it to be doing so, it makes a profound statement on how we feel every little choice we make might anger or please God.

    • February 20, 2012 4:30 pm

      I considered the consequences of his arrogance but in the end left the gods silent–except for a little storm. I’d still like to explore what, if any, consequences his defiance may reap. Thanks for the comment.

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